E: "Mommy, can we just have a baby in our house?"
Me (mentally): "ACK! OH HELL NO, LITTLE TERRORIST!"
Me (verballly): "No, honey, definitely not."
*Note: Notice the restraint in my verbal reply? Yeah. Progress peeps, forward progress.
E: "How about two puppies?"
Me (mentally): "WTF kid, don't you already see mommy lose her mind on a daily basis? Are you trying to actively kill me, Stewie?"
Me (verbally): "How about this, YOU can have two puppies when you grow up and live in your own house? In fact, you can have as many whatever you want when that happens. I'll even babysit. Maybe. We'll talk."
E: "Mommy, mommy, mommy."
Me: "Oh My Gawd, what?!"
E: "I just have boogers in my nose."
Me: "Ok, as long as that is all you have in your nose."
E: "See?" holding a finger up with a "retrieved" booger.
Me: "Um, gross, kid."
E: "No! It's good!"
Thankfully, he did not eat it. Not that he does or I have seen him eat one, but I was concerned with his enthusiastic proclamation of it's goodness.
E: "Mommy, my pee pee, it's tall."